I can’t remember exactly how our relationship started. People often ask me how I got involved with B, but I can’t exactly recall how everything began. We had been doing this “thing” for so long, that I didn’t even know what to call it. I didn’t call him my boyfriend, but it felt like it. He was just a guy I was involved with.
I remember when I invited him over one night. I think it was sometime last year or maybe the year before. It had been a while since we had last talked. It felt like something was off. Something just didn’t feel right. We went back to my room and we laid in my bed together. He always said he liked to hold me. I had my Pandora playlist playing from one of my favorite artists, the Weeknd. One song, I had never heard, began to play. I didn’t know what the song was called or who it was even by, but the lyrics really spoke to me.
Trying to convince myself I’ve found the one
Making the mistake I never learned from
I swear, I always fall for your type
I just can’t explain it at all
“Change the song, ” he said, breaking me from my reverie. “I’m not really feeling the vibe.”
I took my time changing the song because I wanted to continue listening to it. It was called Fall for Your Type by, Jamie Foxx. I kept listening to the lyrics. The resonated with me. I felt like it was talking about me. Me and B. It was a sign. The awkwardness of everything. The way things felt at the moment. I needed to move on, but I couldn’t.
The song read my soul. I chose to ignore it. If I would have taken that night as a sign, I wouldn’t be where I am today. Extremely heartbroken.